


Last Goodbye

by wonderlandiscrumbling



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hurt, Love Confession, Mental Illness, Spoilers for Season Four, Substance Abuse, Suicide mention, season four
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-16
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2019-04-01 07:06:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13993047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonderlandiscrumbling/pseuds/wonderlandiscrumbling
Summary: What if Ed had managed to take the moment to properly tell Lee goodbye?





	Last Goodbye

He knew it wasn’t a question of if this was the last time he was going to see her. It was the last time he was going to see her. The last time they would meet in this room, the last time she would come to him asking him to help her sort out a problem dealing with the Narrows. He tried to memorize her appearance, the perfect elegant way she wore her makeup, the way her long black hair shined, and how gorgeous and powerful she looked in her clothes. He wanted to memorize the smell of flowery perfume with a hint of whiskey, a glass almost always in her hand just like pills were normally in his. Once or twice she caught sight of the pill bottles on the table near the cot where he slept, but she never said anything about them, she’d just sigh, and on occasion give him a saddened look. He didn’t expect her to comment on them, because nobody in his life had really commented on his abuse of medications.

As he stood facing her he felt his heart clenching in his chest, he felt like he should have a speech prepared, or a letter written to express his true feelings towards her. A letter declaring his love, telling her how much he appreciated her help and her encouragement over the past few months. He knew it would be wrong to pretend nothing was wrong, to act as if this were just another day. This was their last day, this was his last day.

“Lee, I-“ The words cut off, he felt fear overwhelm him. The fear she might return his feelings only to make it near impossible to do what he planned on doing, the fear she’d reject him, or hate him.

She looked at him, he could see a worry in her eyes, a recognition as she looked at him.

“What is it?”

“I….I really need to tell you something. Lee I-“

He didn’t know whether or not it was paranoia, but he could swear that she knew what he was going to say, might even know what he was going to do. Still words wouldn’t come, they caught in his throat choking him. He pushed himself forward closing the space between them, he took hold of her hand pulling her closer. He pressed his lips against her cheek in a quick gentle kiss, he pulled back to look at her. Her eyes widened, mouth opening to speak, to probably ask what he was doing.

“I love you. Goodbye, Lee.” He gave her hand a squeeze before releasing it.

He turned and walked away from her, his pace quick in hopes that she wouldn’t attempt to follow him. He didn’t allow himself to think about what she was feeling, about if she was confused or angry with him. It wouldn’t matter much longer. It was the last time he’d ever see her. He just prayed she wouldn’t be the one to find his body.


End file.
